Hypocrisy
One of the most hurtful insults you can bestow on somehow is calling them a hypocrite. At least it is true in my book.
But what if I am the biggest liar, coward and hypocrite there is? I have been asking myself lately where my loyalty lies and whether or not I was doing what I preach. Whether I was self betraying and self sabotaging. Was I true to myself or my higher purpose? Was I sincerely catering to my innerchild? Was I fixing the issues from the root or just patching up things superficially?
The path of healing is a complex one as numerous issues are interwoven into an intricate and multi layered pattern. Sometimes I wait to be healed to start an enterprise. Sadly I realise that once part of the healing is done, another part arises and I cowardly choose to wait and postpone some more. I get more and more frustrated and I feel stuck.
Anger can serve as a meaningful indicator that change and clearance are long due. Sometimes we have to clear the isle of our lives and of our subconscious minds. Be it of our limiting beliefs or of people who are exploiting us both financially and emotionally. Are we our biggest hater and torturer as we willfully abide to the mistreatment? Some may argue that it is a matter of conditioning but I say nay. Our minds can be reprogrammed as we are equiped with willpower.
The next self imposed and self created enemy is none other than perfectionism. In certain cases, the latter is a good trait to have but consequentially it can cruelly hinder our progress and expansion. Same as with the concept of excessive and radical healing to attain ultimate wellbeing. We can block our own development by censoring our sponteneity and creativity when pursuing the subjective human ideal of absoluteness.
Anxiety is not called a disorder for no proper reason at all. It is the demon of confusion, embodied and manifested in the human mind. It commands many of our choices, sometimes erroneously pointing us to what illusionistically appears as safety. The safe partner, the same job, the safe housing option. Sometimes the safe option is the lethal one, here I am speaking from experience.
So my bravest reader are you a self aware, self sabotating hypocrite too ?
Dissentiently yours
Joele Hubert