Medusa's mirror-The desire to be loved

 While working under the guidance of Medusa, she handed me a mirror and asked me to look at my shadow. She asked of me that I face and embrace it .

Shadow work without compassion is straight up self bullying to be honest. What I saw shook me to my core, I saw my fear of abandonment staring right back at me.

The truth is that I would rather live a solitary life, hidden in the shadows,feeling falsely safe behind my wall of hurt and distrust , than putting myself out there to create meaningful and uplifting bonds. 

The fear of being rejected or abandoned haunts me to this day. Why you ask?  Like many divergent individuals, I find it practically impossible to mask or to create fake personas. We show ourselves without deceit or malice, thus without any protection. In this scenario, rejection hits us directly. That is the price to be paid for said "authenticity".

The 8 of cups also coincides with this spiritual guidance. It adds up to the fact that to be able to go forward in life, one has to be able to heal, alchemize and even transcend past pains, betrayals and traumas. It is a card that reminds us of the power of releasing past burdens.

Guess I should stop holding grudges huh? 

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